Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize