What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
