U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
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