I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
