After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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