what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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