I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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