Im at strip club and am horny
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize