More tranny stories later!
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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