we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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