May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
