Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
