i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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