the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
