We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
