he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
