I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
