peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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