morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
