he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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