I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
We are all done wearing pants today
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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