It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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