tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
