I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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