Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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