Define "chronic" masturbator.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Randomize