is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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