Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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