The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize
