Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
