We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Randomize
