she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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