OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Randomize
