yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
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There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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