i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
