i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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