You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize