Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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