I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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