She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
