Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
