Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I think my moral compass just broke
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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