i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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