why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize