I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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