maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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