I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
My bed smells like the plague
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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