Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
