Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Randomize