At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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