No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize